the reason i love england

i know deep in my heart that i don't belong in sydney. the people are too loud, the weather too hot, the clothes too bright. Every year when i visit england i look out the window on the plane onto the rolling green hills and trees and i whisper to myself, 'i'm home.' I know that i will end up there, in london or Bath or cambridge, cold and wet, quite probably very broke, but insanely, totally, completely happy.

But there are other reasons too, i believe (superficially) that the boys are cuter, the accent more endearing, the culture more engaging. While there is a special place reserved in my heart for Paris where i had my first champagne and bought my first item of vintage clothing i feel that i would not fit into such a city. I love it, and it means the world to me, but the judgements and expectations would drive me crazy.

But england... i dont know, maybe it just seems a little more civilised to me. I know thats a dreadful generalisation that i cannot corroborate with any hard evidence. But the projected image is of tea and cakes and ices, of sprawling manor houses and horse riding. I dont know. I just think thats more me...

Anyway, something happened today when i was watching the Brit awards that made me realise the other reason i love england. They know how to take the piss out of themselves, and i admire them for that. At the awards ceremony (which is very serious, actually) THe arctic monkeys were up for a couple of awards and won best british band and best album.

When they were announced for best british band the camera cut to their table and they were quite clearly hammered drunk. They were dressed up in old school grandpa clothes and looked hilarious. When they finally tripped and stumbled their way to the stage this is what their acceptance speech was;

Alex; *speech slurred* We aree de arcick monnkeees. and we are fabulous.

*blows a bugle into the microphone continuously for 2 minutes flat*

*nick falls off the podium, matt crashes a beer bottle against the side of the lectern*.

i love the arctic monkeys, but what i love more is the fact that they can take the piss out of themselves, and liven up what was in all other respects a very boring awards ceremony. glorified inebriation... england really is god's country!
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